Emptiness and Fullness

On this journey of self discovery there comes a point - which comes again and again - where the conventional activities of the thinking mind (the movements of thought and emotion) have been looked into, seen, and understood to a significant degree with the result that they have much less power to shape experience.  The issue that can - and regularly does - arise at these points is "What remains?"  There comes a sense of the meaninglessness of the ways in which thought constructs a life, a self, a sense of stability, consistency, continuity, and all the pleasurable or judgemental ideas and concepts about life, love, self, and others.  So much of what is normally taken to provide a sense of meaning and purpose - including the spiritual search - no longer has the power to satisfy or fulfil one's existence.  So much has been seen through and there's no going back.  What remains?  There can come this sense of flatness, a boring sameness to life without drama, struggle to achieve, seeking after worldly experiences or spiritual realization.  Even a feeling of depression or existential despair can show up and vie for a foothold in our basic experience of living.

What to do at these points?  Is there anything to do, or is there only the looking and being with "what is" each moment without buying into any stories or conclusions thought may begin to create?  There can be a seeing through the mind's resistance to perceived meaninglessness, nothingness, or void, its creation of flatness and boredom as an alternative to dying into the Unknown.  A seeing through the reactions of fear to the falling away of the known and its imagined security.  This remaining with the looking and being present with whatever is arising then can bring a release of the resistance and reactivity of the mind.  The negative emptiness dissolves and the experience "flips" from emptiness to fullness.  It was only thought that was creating any sense of lack;  when that activity of thought melts away there is only completeness, with nothing lacking, a sense of simply being which is formless and really indescribable.  This essential Beingness may express itself as well-being, joy, a sense of beauty and "love" or harmony, or perhaps just as a simple contentment without any cause, an enjoyment of one's true nature undisturbed by the restless graspings and aversions of thought, without evaluation or conceptualization.  This has a meaning beyond meaning, a meaningless meaning or significance where all questions have disappeared and there is just "This".